Look, Tristan on TV

So this cameraman was standing around the other day and thought that Tristan was just so cute...

http://www.king5.com/video/eveningmagazine-index.html?nvid=401802

No really this is the rest of the footage and a bit of a longer story about the school program that Tristan and I participated in last year. There are some really nice shots of him.

love to all

Playtime at Ravenna-Eckstein Comm Ctr

Ravenna-Eckstein Indoor Playtime

Ages: 1–4 (Play Space); 2–5 (Tot Gym)

The Ravenna-Eckstein Community Center has great

opportunities for you and your children to play in a safe, fun,

and interactive space. Our Play Space, appropriate for ages 4

and younger, and Tot Gym for ages 2–5, feature balls, bikes,

ride-ons, and educational toys. Parents must stay with

children at all times and clean the area after use. All times are

subject to change due to community center events or

activities, so please call ahead at 206-684-7534.

Location: Ravenna-Eckstein CC

Mon. 10:15 a.m.–6 p.m.

Tue. 2:30–8:30 p.m.

Wed. 2:30–8:30 p.m.

Thu. 2:30–8:30 p.m.

Fri. 1:15–8:45 p.m.

Activity Fee: $2 per child

Fun things summer to do in Seattle Parks

Click on the title of this post for a link to the Summer in the Parks playlist for 2009. Looks like there are interesting things like: concerts, fairs/carnivals, gym time etc.

Look Ma, I cut my hair....

Paolo took Tristan for his first hair cut on his birthday. He got them all cut and came home with some attitude to spare.

A Very Special Birthday Present

So, as most of you know my 37th birthday was yesterday. My son decided to give me a very cool present. We were in Kelly's classroom for the Roots of Empathy program and one of the students decided to play her flute for Tristan. He got very quiet and watched her with a smile. Then when she started playing "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star" he pointed at her and turned to me to smile. It was the first time he pointed at anything. Recognizing the song and trying to get my attention. It was very sweet.

Then at a very lovely lunch with girlfriends, he signed more for the first time. Well he didn't really sign it, he clapped which is close to the tapping your fingers together (see picture). But he clapped each time after eating something that he wanted more of and didn't do it the times that he refused a second bite of the food. This is the first time that he was consistently trying to communicate by not crying.

Then tonight he looked at Paolo and said, "da,da,da,da". He only did it twice, but again, it was with intent. So cool. And for the first time since he was about 4 months old, he wanted me to rock him and sing to him before he went to bed. He told me this by not doing the usual protesting and squirming as I tried to rock him. Recently, I'd even given up on trying to snuggle him, but bedtime last night was rough and I thought that maybe it was exacerbated by his new mild separation anxiety. My unsnuggly kid decided at least for tonight that listening to mom sing and snuggling in the rocking chair was actually ok. It was one of my best mommy moments since his first smile. That one made me cry. This one just made me feel warm and fuzzy.

Hey, I'm a mom and its kind of cool.

More pics of Roots of Empathy

Here are more pictures taken at the Roots of Empathy Celebration:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/37996625142@N01/3578958060/in/set-72157618921749541/

Look, Ma. I'm on TV!

Tristan and I made it into a local news story this week. It was a gathering for the Roots of Empathy program that we've been participating in over the past year in Kelly's classroom. You can see all 3 of us right at the beginning when they are singing the "Hello" song.

Roots of Empathy on King5 news 

Movie Crying Rooms

Click on the title of this post for a link Paolo found in the Seattle paper about the crying rooms and Mommy & baby infant times around the Seattle area. 

May 23- Centre George Pompidou

Modern art can be really cool or really weird. 

We had a hard time getting to this museum and were turned away from the Kandinsky exhibit (we have museum passes and you need another 14euro ticket for this exhibit). So as we wandered through the main collection, i kept trying to connect with the pictures. Then i ran into this piece by Simon Hantai, who i've never heard of and just had to stand and stare for a while.  Apparently he made it by wadding up the canvas, pre-stretched, and adding paint blind. Trying to remove the subjectivity of the artist. I'm not sure what i like other than the use of negative space, but i stared at it for a while.

My only good picture of the day was this one taken from the 4th floor of this museum.

May 22- Rodin Musee, My WOW moment

I finally got my "wow-zing" moment. The Rodin museum is a garden full of bronze statues that we wandered around in for a couple hours. Tristan got to play in the sand and babble loudly to his heart's content. I got to get up close and personal with one of my favorite artists. Because we were already outside i got to move slowly and take my time. 

There is something about sculpture that is very visceral and kinesthetic. I have a desperate time not running my hands over it, touching, interacting with it.

The only downer, the one statue that i really wanted to see Caryatid Who Has Fallen is on loan to some other museum. I come to Paris and really the one statue that I'm beyond psyched to see is somewhere else. I get to the place its supposed to be just at the end of our tour, look at the podium and ....empty. I double check the map, look around to see if its been moved. I go inside to see if its there for some reason. Nope. So i ask one of the attendants, in my broken french, "where is this statue?" pointing to the museum guide. She turns the map around and says, "here" pointing to the space in the garden. I say no its no there. She tries to explain where that space is physically in relation to where we are. Again i say its not there. And she gives me this blank stare, "oh then someone else has it." Just like that, its not here so it must be somewhere else. Irony.

May 22- Rodin Musee & Metro Shakedown

We used our metro cards to go to the Rodin museum this morning. After making our transfer and riding toward our last stop, a Metro Cop got on the train and asked to see everyone's tickets. Being naive, we handed ours over even feeling a little smug that we were all above board. The cop pulls us off the train (fortunately at our stop) and explains that the card which actually has the money and RIF tag is not valid without the accompanying piece of paper that you write your name on and tape a photo to the back. Paolo tells them that the nice man at the car rental place told him we didn't need them and asks where we can get them. The cop brings over another cop who explains the whole thing in english and then tells us there is a 70euro fine per person per incident.  We both choke on our spit. He then "takes pity" on us and tells us he will site us for the lesser offense at 25euro per incident.  My argumentative and logical husband asks the obvious question, "why do you need to know who the card belongs to?" And they say, so that two different people can't use it in the same day. And i think to myself, very quietly, you charge for every time someone walks through the gate, why does it matter who has the pass in their hand? You make the same amount of money. The cop then tells us to tear off a piece of paper, write our names and paste a picture then put that within the pass jacket. And my logical husband asks, "what is to keep someone else from doing that with the same card?" and i tell him to let it go (5 times). The answer is of course, nothing. It's an illogical system and we aren't going to change it. It just doesn't make sense. I grabbed his arm, said a polite, "Merci" and dragged him out of the metro trying to avoid another fine for being a smart ass.

New fun mommy facts

1. Pull-ups do nothing to contain baby diarrhea.

2. Underwire bras still work without the underwires. (i know this because i came to Europe with one bra. The only trip i've ever taken with only one bra. Both underwires promptly broke. They finally poked through yesterday and i had to pull them out. Bra still does what it's supposed to do. Why don't i buy another one? Because bra's sold in stores in Europe only come in 3 sizes: 1, 2 & 3. I'm pretty sure i'm none of the above;)

3. Kiwi seeds come out looking exactly the same. Leading to the statement, "let me get the kiwi seed off the end of your wiener."

4. small children always go for the electric toys.  T wakes up wanders around the room and promptly finds the laptop hidden under the pillow on the far side of the bed.

5. nothing makes you want your own language more than a medical need. I've been dreaming about how to explain a tick bite to a french doctor....i've no frackin clue.

6. when you can smell the rancid odor coming from your child's pants in an outdoor cafe, its time to go home.

May 20, 2009- Paris: the purpose of vacation

After running through the Louvre and traipsing through Notre Dame, we came home (to our very small 70Euro/night apartment in the Ministry district, lots of Gendarmes guarding doors) to make lunch and try to get the munchkin to sleep. After he finally went down (difficult nap day) and i relaxed from my "Bad Mommy" moment (My child had a tick in his head. I think he got it in the garden of our last hotel. I ran my fingers over it in the bath the night before but thought it must be a scab where he bumped his head. It wasn't until Paolo felt it and really looked at it that i realized that my child had had a parasite chewing on his scalp for at least 24hrs. Talk about "Bad Mommy". not only did he get it, but i missed it completely and probably wouldn't have looked again until bath time tonight. My thoughts of course ran catastrophic, "this is the thing that i've done that will scar my child for life." We were going to remove it when we got home, but it fell/jumped out at some point during the morning. i immediately did 2 things, i checked the rest of him for bumps, bites, bugs and looked up the incidence of Lyme's Disease in France. It's high, 9.4% per 100,000. I'm dreading explaining to my pediatrician, "Um, Dr. Numrych?") but...after sending an email to the Dr. and calming down from that....

I remembered that the point of  being on vacation is to actually spend time with people you care about in a cool place. Lunch at home was the best part of my day, and actually that was pretty nice. I wasn't disappointed that i didn't get a bigger thrill out of the art i'd seen or have a "magic Paris" moment, I just felt serene and warm that being with my family was a really cool thing. I have to figure out how to hold onto that feeling.... When i do i'll write a book ;)

May 20, 2009 II- Paris- Embarrassed to be a Tourist

So we travelled to Notre Dame this afternoon and stood right where this photo was taken (not my photo). Huge, amazing, really beautiful stained glass windows, pretty cool info on how it was built then saved and immortalized by Victor Hugo. But we were there at noon Mass. Now, as most of you know, I'm not christian or catholic and don't generally agree with views of either church. But walking through a huge sacred space with worshipers attempting to achieve some calm or connection generally makes me at least respectful if not a little "woo-woo". But moving through this church with this crowd was like watching people at pike place market: people on the telephone, people exclaiming, laughing, talking loudly, flash photography, mimicking the priest, kids running and screaming, people touching everything. I came out a little sick to my stomach and overwhelmed. Everyone treated it just like Disneyland, and i felt embarrassed to be intruding or to be part of that crowd. Maybe that's just my weird Ms. Manners/ propriety streak that obviously everyone doesn't share.

Also had a weird, "oh that's where the stereotype came from" moment.  Since I've met him, Paolo has been very negative and derogatory about Gypsies. I thought it was just northern Italian cultural bias. Then Rick Steves had a warning, "watch out for the gypsy women, they are asking for alms with one hand and picking your pocket with the other." But at Notre Dame, they were everywhere. They start with, "Excuse me do you speak english?" and then hand you a written note with a story about hard times and please help (think cardboard signs on the freeway ramps). We eventually just started answering in Italian and they left us alone, but i watched about 6 of them work the crowd. Targeting the obvious Americans, mussing their hair and adding a very demure/beaten demeanor. I didn't see any pick-pocketing, but then I'm guessing i would have missed it even if i was happening. When they would gather together, their appearance and posture would shift so that they looked like every other person in the square. It made it so clear that it was an act, a good one and maybe with honest roots, but an act none the less. I still don't think that this applies to all Romany but, i get where the horrible bias comes from. It's just very weird to have a stereotype played out so baldly.

May 20, 2009- Paris- Encountering Legends

Moved quickly through a very small portion of the Louvre this morning. We were waiting in line, 15 min prior to opening. A security guard comes by to compress the line asking everyone to move closer up, except Paolo, Tristan & me. He pulled us out of line with no clue as to why we were being singled out.  I was trying to figure out if we looked like terrorists or just dressed to scruffy. But he moved us to a separate line, let us stand for a couple of minutes and then told us that we were essentially at the front of a special circumstances line and when the museum opened we would be first in the door. Coolness: stroller gets you to the front of your own special line. Nervous: i don't think i understand French well enough to understand if he's joking with us.

So we booked through the wing of Italian art to the Mona Lisa (or La Jaconda). I expected to feel some sort of "ah" moment or at least a little "Divinci Code Moment" but really, 12 feet away watching people take flash photography just left me...blah. I wanted to look at the brush strokes and really examine the background, etc. But maybe i'll just do that online.

 Then we zoomed through a different wing to get to the Venus Di Milo (or Aphrodite) which again i expected "zing". This time at least i got a little, "wow-ish" but then the kid started fussing and we had to high tail it out to avoid exposing the other patrons to our ensuing meltdown.

Ah, art with kids....   

May 17, 2009- Serlat to Ambois

Today we left our very tourista hotel after wandering around town looking for a patisserie only to remember that nothing is generally open on Sundays. Another hotel breakfast for us, one eating and then walking the kid while the other finishes. Ah, the joys of parenthood.

We travelled to Les Eyies about 60km away.  Here there are caves with evidence of human existence dating back over 400,000 years. We walked through an amazing museum with videos and pieces of stone that had been worked into tools before the Romans were even Cesar's dream.  It's quite an amazing thing to stand next to something you know is older than anything you have ever seen in your life. 

Next, because my husband really loves me, we went on a tour of Le Grotto Chambarelles, a 240m (1/8th of a mile) cave under the river that has some of the oldest known cave drawings anywhere.  As you walk deeper into the cave the art moves from simple scratches in the wall to more detailed depictions of horses, bison, mammoth,and rhinoceros (yes they lived in france ;) The artists began to use the contours of the cave to depict movement and to give the art 3 dimensions. For me it was amazing to think that this may be where art was created. I think that many different people crawled (it was originally less than 4 ft high at most points) through this cave passing the previous drawings to find a place to make their own mark.  I think they don't know why, whether it was part of a spiritual ritual or a rite of passage. Although it was all in French, so there was a lot of pointing and nodding and my affirmation of, "Si!" (I'm still stuck in Italian ;) 

I turned back to Paolo near the end of the walk to ask how he was doing. He said, "I'm bored out of my mind. We're wandering through the dark looking at chicken scratches....But as long as you're happy." Ah the things we put up with for love ;)

Next we had the most amazing lunch, and probably the best food since we've been in Europe in a random little restaurant in a random little village. The sunday market was just ending and a group of people sat down next to us and were laughing and talking. Then they sang a French folk song. Needless to say the fantastic food and being in the presence of people just going about their lives made it a very memorable moment. Tristan even sat in the stroller for 1 1/2 hrs without fussing. (that has yet to happen anywhere.) We were able to enjoy our food together without rushing. it was just fantastic.

We ended our day by checking into a hotel in Amboise, France in the Loire valley which is the wine region. Paolo went foraging for our dinner and actually found a pizza place that was open and sent him home with both pizza and pasta.  When he got home and halfway through our meal he realized why the chef had been looking at him so strangely, and possibly why its been so hard for us to find takeout throughout the trip. He was asking in French, "Es'que vous avez un pasta que je peu portez avec moi?"  Which was supposed to mean, "do you have any pasta that i can take away with me?" However, while the verb, "portare" in Italian means to carry, in french it means to wear. So he was actually asking, "Do you have any pasta that i can wear with myself?" We are still giggling and wondering if fettuccine or cannoli would look better on him.

More tomorrow...

Mineral water

Tristan can't decide if he likes mineral water or not.... keeps asking for more then makes this face.... 

Best thing ever.

May 16, 2009- Travel to Serlat, France

Read about this incredible town and was very excited to see another, fully restored mideivil town. We called from the road to find a hotel, going on the JAFA principle. We reserved a room in a small hotel overlooking town square. Perfect right?

We got to Serlat on market day, which means totally crazy trinket pushers mixed with blue haired grandmothers from Oklahoma and everyone speaking at full volume. After finding a parking place and trekking 1/2 mile to town square (you can't drive there) we were taken up to our room over an ice cream store (Les Chambres de Glasces- the ice cream rooms). Great room, very 17th century. Up 3 narrow flights of stairs and you enter through the cafe on the ground floor.  As we drug Tristan and his stroller up the stairs i began to have nightmares of both having to drag our luggage down the hill and over the cobblestones but then to have the noise of central square on Saturday night keep him awake.  We tried to have a little family quiet hour and then began the trudge back to the car.  Halfway there, we decided that there was no way w

e could do it. We found another room in a hotel with a garage and an elevator and went back to explain in broken french that dragging all the baby equipment up the stairs was likely going to kill us all.

We then settled into our 5th night of french take out: croissants, water, cheese from the store and soda. I'm looking forward to some version of a real dinner at some point.

May 14-15, 2009: Arles, France

This has to be one of the coolest places we've stayed so far.  As the picture shows,the view from the hotel couldn't get better, right next to the 2nd century roman colosseum. So well preserved that they actually hold bullfights and gladiator games in it to this day. These pictures are literally right out of our window.

The city was founded by Greeks in 6th century BC, then the romans took it over, the celts moved in, it was invaded by Sareceans and Vikings. In medieval times, they built a whole town inside of the colosseum. Van Gogh painted several works here until he became so unstable that the city petitioned to have him leave.

The old city is medieval in design but modern in use which means

 that cars are tolerated but not necessarily accommodated as you can see by our photos trying to get out of town.

May 13- Nice, Cote d'Azure, France

Today we drove from Italy to Nice on the Cote D'Azure (blue coast) of France.  The pic is of Tristan putting his feet into the Mediterranean, as you can tell he's not particularly pleased about the whole thing.

Must say that for all the hype, Nice was really just a big touristy city for us. Loud, smoggy, water is cold and the beaches are full of rocks. Not a handful of sand in sight. We did have a great dinner, some white fish in a little corner cafe in the old town. Maybe our last dinner out in France as Tristan made it through about 30 minutes and no food in France comes faster than 45 minutes.

Tristan & Logan Hamilton in Italy

Two cuties

Nona Nori

Someone asked for a picture of Tristan and his great grandmother, Nori.  Here they are sharing Tristan's favorite toy in the length of our stay, her cane.  Eventually, we had to hide it so that she could actually use it without Tristan trying to steal it ;)

May 12, 2009- Lucca

Tuesday we visited the walled city of Lucca. It is a beautiful medieval town with a fully 

intact curtain wall some 25+ feet thick. Home of Puccini (see picture). It was fun to wander through the town, but the best part was the walk around the top of the wall. It circumnavigates the city with a path about the size of a normal american street. Think  a short Burke-Gilman on steroids.

I realized 2 things during this visit. The first was really how much i shut down and stopped talking because i couldn't keep up with the Italian conversation. It was amazing to understand everything that people around me were saying and to get to interact and share my thoughts whenever i wanted to . The second is that getting by speaking Italian in Casarsa was vastly different than actually trying to buy something in Lucca.  I had to depend on Jen because every time the shop keeper asked me a question, i just froze and tripped over my tongue. Or tried to spit out something in French...old habits die hard;} I did come away with an amazing platter though, so it was worth looking like a fool.

May 11, 2009- Sarzana, Italy

We travelled from 

Casarsa across Italy to Sarzana today stopping in Reggio nell' Emelia for our lunch break. As you can see from  the photos, Tristan found a great way to cool off and relax. The only problem was the wedding party trying to take photos in the same fountain. I think a very wet Tristan and I are in the background of someone else's memories ;)

In Sarzana, we met our friends from San Diego, Mike and Jen Hamilton and their baby, Logan who was born 7/13/2008. We had a fantastic dinner and chatted about their experience in Italy so far.  Mike is working for NATO on a 3 year contract. So far they love being in Italy, but have discovered disadvantages to living here. Primarily, its tough to really get anything done. Get your phone hooked up, get a dryer fixed, deal with internet connection issues, etc. So great for vacation, when you don't need to get anything done, tough for everyday living. 

May 5-9, 2009: Casarsa, Italy

Visiting Paolo's Grandmother, Nona Nori, in Casarsa della Delizia first. This is the town that produces both the Carsasa & Moresutti brands of wine (which you can find in most NW grocery stores due to Paolo's father, Gary Raden.) Other than it being where Paolo's mom grew up, not much of note has happened or is happening here.

Small rural town, think Eastern WA with accents. Most prominent political question, "why did you vote for the black guy?" Let me tell you there is No night life. We spent many nights (midnight to 2a) walking around town trying to get Tristan back to sleep. Biggest thing happening, dogs barking at us. woohoo. Everything closes between 12:30 and 3:30p, I mean everything. (no grocery, no coffee, no bank...etc) And restaurants don't open up until

 7p at the earliest. Very problematic when your kid goes to sleep around 7p.

A note on jet lag: not helped when you have the wrong equipment. We have a very cute, very trendy (according to Ann) pup tent that weighs about 1#. I figured a better travel option than a foldable crib. My child hates it!! I mean scream and fight and wake up constantly won't go back to sleep hates it.  after 3 nights fighting with him, we broke down and begged the local baby store to sell us a pac-n-play. Best 60euros we ever spent!! Tristan slept through the night. Although, we had a bit of PTSD, waking up every time he moved assuming that he was waking up and was going to scream again.  We eventually got over it;)

And the happy baby got to play with little Italian babies at the local park after making a trip through the local plant nursery.

I just thought this plant, Pitcher Plant, was so cool. Had to document it somehow. Turns out its much cooler in concept than exciting in pictures.

Next: the other side of Italy

First Vacation Post!!! Vancouver Airport

This is was the first leg of our adventure. We left Seattle at 4p on Monday and could not board the plan to London until 8:30p. Tristan decided that this was a great time to practice his newest skill.  

After wearing himself out, we boarded a plane to London. Overnight flight and after a little Benedryl help, Tristan did wonderfully. Mildly cranky about not walking around, but we all got some sleep. Changed airports in London and then waited around for 4 hours. Scrambled through customs & luggage in Venice to make sure that we could get our car before the rental agency closed at 11p. Gotta love Italian customer service...

My biggest stress during the trip: the Italian luggage handlers losing our stroller.  We left it in London at the gate check. Arrive in Venice, ask the luggage person when we get off the plane, she sends someone for it. Wait 10 minutes, watch all others de-board. Paolo runs for the car agency to make sure we can drive to Carsarsa. I'm left with my 30# child waiting for the stroller.... Its not coming, the luggage woman goes to find her worker.....waiting.  She comes back and says, "its not there." and then walks away.  I follow asking, "where do i go, etc" The stewardess & captains, seeing my distress and small child, ask what is missing, I tell them and the Italian woman turns to say, "you must go to the lost and found and register a complaint." I bite my lip to keep the tears in my eyes from spilling over... hello jet lag and stress.

So, I carry my exhausted 30# child through the airport with diaper bag etc in tow. I get to customs to watch the agents closing all windows.  They unlock the stamps, say Ciao! and at my "Hello" in english, stamp the books without any questions. (must have looked frazzled.) I make it to the baggage claim and find the lost and found window. I watch the woman in the window being yelled at by a man who speaks neither Italian nor English...he is working under the mistaken impression that if you just speak louder, you will somehow get through.  The woman in the window was not impressed. 

So he's done, i move to the window describe my problem and she says, "BA from London?" I affirm and she says the most beautiful thing, "its here, they found it!" Then the BA pilot and copilot show up to escort me to the oversize luggage window and track down my stroller. (Hurray for English chivalry. I must have looked really frazzled.) I then try to cram 2 suitcases and the biggest duffle bag ever filled with child crud (it takes a bunch of stuff to travel with an infant. I know now why my sister had to buy a new car...trunk space!) I bluff my way through customs, again no questions, to find Paolo & freedom waiting.

36 hours is a long time to be in transit.  More soon.

Paolo's Story about the Birth

I just found this while cleaning out my email inbox. Thought I'd share it with you all. Ah, the memories.


Paolo Says:
This is a bit of a story, and some of you have heard it, so bear with me. ;-)

Jen and I went into our regular midwife appointment on Wed the 11th (Tristan's due date), and we discovered that Jen was suffering from preclampsya. It wasn't yet alarming, but everyone decided it would be best if we coaxed him out of Jen rather than wait for him to take his time.

We went home to pack, and do some laundry, get our friend Kelly to sit for the pooch, and then off to UW hospital we went.

Upon arrival, we found out that the birth plan that Jen had so painstakingly written unfortunately wouldn't matter very much. She was hooked up an IV, several monitoring cables, and told to stay in bed. She was then given a cervix "ripener", which was supposed to prepare her for induction.

As a side note, nobody ever tells you that induction is a multi-day process. Apparently, we've seen a few too many TV shows, and we expected Tristan to arrive within hours of the drugs flowing. Not so.

After 12 hours of overnight cervix ripening, during which she was poked and prodded hourly, she then got hooked up to Petocin, which was then supposed to start contractions. She started at the lowest dose possible around 9am, and it was turned up every 40 mins or so. By 8pm she was getting real contractions which required the prodigious use of the coping techniques we learned. It mostly consists of "breathing", which to a non-birthing male, sounds absolutely crazy, but apparently works.

During the next 5-6 hours Jen went through many many full on contractions, arriving every 1-3 minutes depending on the position. Unfortunately, in about the last 3 hours, her contractions turned into back labor, and it made her feel like the contraction never really ended, so there wasn't a rest period in the middle. She hung in there like a trooper, and refused all pain medication.

At around 2 am she had had it, and the coping techniques weren't working so well anymore. Our amazing doula, Caren, decided to get the midwife to come check on the progress. Jen was at 10cm (the requisite amount of cervix dilation). The doula then broke her bag of water, and tried to get Tristan to drop.

Unfortunately, very much like his father, Tristan was having none of that plan. Jen was pushed into many positions over the next 3 hours to try to get him into place (since we assumed he wasn't dropping because his positioning was poor). By about 4:30-5am, Jen's contractions weren't getting Tristan anywhere, he had receded back to his comfortable position in her uterus, and her cervix was back at 7cm.

Another side note, as a male witnessing a live birth, if men had to give birth, the human race would have ended long, long ago. From my point of view, aside from my amazement at Jen's ability to cope with prodigious amounts of pain, and my happiness at her providing us with a son, for me, labor is not the magical thing I had once assumed it would be. It's an ugly affair, usually with a very happy ending. I just know I could not handle the pain, constant direction of my body positioning by doctors and nurses, the lack of control over my own body, but mostly the pain. That being said, Jen's experience was probably different than mine. ;-)

Anyway, at this point, we were offered and recommended a c-section. Jen was at the end of her ability to cope and saw the chance for a successful end to the labor, and took that option. I think that if this had been the recommendation after 1-2 hours of pushing, she would have been upset, but she really gave it her all. She found strength I didn't know she had, and am exceptionally proud of her. I hope he remembers what his mom did for him, but remembering my time in adolescence, I think I'm hoping for a bit too much. ;-)

Anyway, they explained the procedure, which was great, but they also talked to Jen and me through about 5 sets of contractions. That was the hardest part for me. I knew that the pain relief was just a short trip to the OR and needle stick away, and to see her still cope and deal with resurgent back labor contractions and have the strength to talk to the doctors about the risks of the procedure again impressed me immensely.

They then wheeled her back to the OR and started to numb her up. I had the opportunity to wait around for 30 minutes, until they were ready to operate. It's hard waiting for your wife to be cut open after zero sleep for 30 hours or so. Watching labor makes my complaining kind of quaint. ;-)

Anyway, I went back there, and she was blissfully unaware of anything under her nipple level. They cut her open, but didn't let me watch, much to my chagrin. A short time later a 9lb 10oz and 22.25 inch long Tristan Kai Raden was born. He was properly positioned and everything, but just too big for Jen to deliver. He is very happy and healthy, and 1 day after his birth starting to get the hang of breastfeeding.

Jen is doing well. She's tired and feels like she's done a gazillion sit-ups, which she did. She's healing well, and finally got her IV shunt taken out about 30 minutes ago. If she continues to do well, it looks like we're going to go home on Sunday afternoon.

We all seem to be most awake in the afternoon, so we are accepting visitors in then, from about 3-7pm. The room's not so big, but folks are welcome to stop by if they want to. We've loved all the flowers, but we're running out of space for them...

You can also call my cell or Jen's, and we may answer if we're able to or awake.

The redux of the c-section is that I'm on baby lifting and changing duty for the next 2 weeks, so I guess I won't actually have much time during my "time off" from work. ;-)

Paolo

Breast feeding, just hype?

Apparently, breast feeding, or at least the modern mania for it, is more a product of PR than good science. Makes me very sad for the hours i know that myself and others have spent agonizing over not being able to breast feed for as long as we thought we were supposed to. Ah, the drama of being a mom ;)

Here's the Atlantic Monthly article (or just click on the title bar of this post): http://www.theatlantic.com/doc/200904/case-against-breastfeeding

Books about Parenting

Here is a list of parenting books suggested on one of my list-serves. I have highlighted the ones that I have read or definitly recommend: (to be clear I've only read 3 1/2 of them ;)

What's Going on in There?--Eliot
Unconditional Parenting--Kohn
Emotional Intelligence--Goleman
Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child--Gottman
Your One-Year Old (series)--Ames
Blessing of a Skinned Knee--Mogel
Everyday Blessings--Kabat-zinn
Parenting from the Inside Out--Siegel
The Mindful Brain--Siegel
Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves--Aldort
Becoming the Parent You Want to Be--Davis
Touchpoints--Brazelton
Positive Discipline--Nelsen
The Power of Positive Parenting--Latham
The Scientist in the Crib--Gopnik
The Female Brain--Brizendine
Sippy Cups Are Not for Chardonnay--Wilder-Taylor
I Was a Really Good Mom Before I Had Kids--Ashworth
Operating Instructions--Lamott

The little monkey goes swinging

And boys will play...

Conspicuous Consumption

ah, the training starts early in the Raden home:

Places to take your kid(s) in Seattle

These were passed on from another Seattle mom:

restaurants/coffee places:
Tougo Coffee at 18th and Union
Mosaic in Wallingford
Tot Spot in Woodinville
Serendipity in Magnolia
My Coffeehouse in Madison Valley
Madrona & Montlake alehouses
Tutta Bella
Vios

outings:
Seattle Art Museum & Asian Art Museum
Children's Museum at Seattle Center
Science Center
zoo, zoomazium has toddler time at 10 and noon daily
aquarium & zoo, can buy combined membership
playground (baby swing), soon can visit wading pools
Volunteer Park Conservatory
walk around Green Lake
Mockingbird Books in Green Lake has storytime at 11am
Everett Childrens Museum

classes:
Spanish and sign language class at Phinney Center
classes and toddler gym (Miller, Rainier, W. Sea., Northgate recommended) at community centers--check out kingcounty.gov for details
Nurturing Pathways class at Queen Anne community center
Music class at Green Lake community center
library story times
swim (Mt. Lake Terrace, classes at W. Sea. Y)
waterbabies
safe and sound swimming

other tips:
using a lightweight stroller or the ergo makes the bus easier
gocitykids.com
redtricycle.com

Spontaneous Clapping

i think my child is secretly practicing new activities and then bringing them out to see if he can shock me. Yesterday, while on the changing table getting ready for bed, he started clapping his hands. Not just putting them together, or touching the fingers of one to the palm of the other (both of which I've seen him do before) but really clapping. Like, "hey i'm excited to have clean pants and go to bed." So i looked at him and smiled and then started clapping my hands. He gave me this, "WTF?" look as if to say, "I've never seen you do that before?"

I had a moment where i thought, oh my god my child is going to have to learn everything spontaneously. I haven't taken the time to teach him how to clap, how is he going to learn other things. Completely ignoring that a) he already clapped by himself, without my focused input at all and b) i have an amazing nanny that spends two days per week teaching him how to do these things and c) there's a cute 18month old running around showing him how to do a bunch of stuff and d) kids learn by observing stuff.

So moral of the story: mommy is going to freak out about everything. When its bad its really really bad and when its good its still anxiety provoking. I called my sister a week ago to ask if that sense of guilt that i'm not doing enough ever goes away. She left me a message that said, "Short answer,NO. You worry that you are/aren't breast feeding. that they aren't getting enough calories. that they are being exposed to the right books/games/toys etc. then you send them to preschool and worry about what other people are going to teach them and you try not to freak out when they come home to show you how cool it is to blow bubbles in milk or snort pixie sticks." I thought, shit what have i gotten myself into? the stuff you don't know/learn/pay attention to before jumping off this cliff.

happy mothering, ;)

best travel advice ever

this site has the most comprehensive and well thought out travel advice i've seen yet. I know its too late for some (sorry T) but i'm really glad i finally found something that seems helpful.

www.deliciousbaby.com

Tristan 6-9 months

Click here for Tristan's 6-9 months photo album

Newest photos of the munchkin

Photo Log 3-6 months

Tristan- 3-6 months

Click here for Tristan's Picasa album 3-6months

Photo Log 0-3 months

Tristan's photo record birth - 3 months

Click here for Tristan's Picasa Album 0-3months

Just The Beginning

Now that 6 months have gone by and I'm on a somewhat abbreviated but no longer insane sleep schedule. I've been thinking that I should start tracking some of the random thoughts/ideas/experiences that come up in the face of motherhood. Because...well...just because.

First of all, the idea of me being a mom is just weird. I mean there are still days where I have junior high-esque anxiety about what clothing to wear and now I'm supposed to be responsible for someone else's well being? Filling out the form at the pediatrician's office often creates a stunned silence in the ongoing cacophony that is my brain, i get to the line: relationship to patient and i have to stop and think.... oh, right, "Mother". And the Greek chorus in the soundtrack of my life cries, "I'm someones mom." Then i begin to wonder who in their right mind would let me be a mom and desperately I try to do the math to determine how many ounces of formula the munchkin goes through in a day. So i don't look like a total idiot when the doctor asks. (then of course, he doesn't ask...)

All right, first post accomplished, off to change a diaper and fold some laundry. As my good friend Brian often says, "holy crap we're adults now!"